In Reverse...

Since we just created this blog site yesterday, some of the stories we're gonna share are from before the first post, so don't get confused. :)

One week after arriving in Manila we went down to Puerto Galera to see our friends. Alex tried for several days to text and call them before we left in order to let them know we were coming, but they never responded. After a 2 1/2 hour drive to Batangas, and a 1 1/2 hour wait for the boat to leave, we were on our way. It was then that Alex got the call from Pastor Al (the pastor of the church started down in Puerto Galera) saying that he was in Manila for a week! (...where we just came from) This meant that they would not be having a church service on Sunday while we would be there. Sayang (Tagalog for "oh, well.") We were still able to meet with Alona and catch up with her as well as work on special orders.

Upon our arrival at Tamaraw, the beach resort we like to stay at when we are down in Puerto, we learned that even though this was off-season, they had a group of 200 people coming to stay that night at the resort, so there was "no room in the inn." After a tricycle ride on a road that is about as rocky as a river bed, we arrived at the other end of the beach, where we used to stay years ago when visiting Puerto. This is the area where we first met Alona. The resort we once cherished is now very run down, and they have built up many junky little buildings around it. But the price was great (about $11 per night), so we stayed. We had to request that they clean the bathrooms first, though...

Jamin, a 20 year old guy from California who was doing a 2-week mission trip here, was along "for the ride." (He is a whole other story.) Even though we were hit with several disappointments, he was refreshingly positive. Actually, because of my emotional state, it was far from refreshing...it was...annoying. All I could think was, "If you had to live here and experience things never going as planned all the time instead of just visiting like a tourist, you wouldn't be so excited."

That night from midnight to 3 a.m. I wrestled with God. I wasn't just sad that we had to leave our families and our pleasant lives in Wisconsin to move to Manila, I was hating the fact that I was back in Manila to stay. I laid awake crying and telling God how I felt, then I prayed for people (the girls in my prayer group, mostly), and prayed for others until finally I went to sleep.

The next morning, I woke up early enough to go out to the beach and watch the sunrise, (taking pictures, of course). God had new mercy for me, and I was feeling a little better. I decided to walk along the beach, looking for shells. Now, that may not sound very unusual, but this beach is a rock beach...you hardly ever find shells. But God had done that for me before...one of my favorite stories in how God came through for me (using my son, Joey) also includes finding treasures on the beach. (But again, that's another story..) So began a debate in my head that went something like this...."God is going to give me a shell to show me His love today....Not necessarily, just because He's done that before doesn't mean you can say 'He will do it again'....But I've been learning in my Bible study on the fruit of the spirit about God's kindness and love towards me, it's just like Him to give me a shell!...But he might have a different blessing in mind...It's okay, I know He loves me and I can expect this blessing from Him...I think He's going to give me a shell." (Come on, you talk to yourself like that too, don't you??)

Well, I not only found one, but 12 shells! One had like a pearlized-gold inside. One was different than I'd ever seen on that beach before...and then a verse... I don't remember memorizing Jeremiah 33:3, but the Holy Spirit can help you recall verses you have read. I didn't know the reference until looking it up later, but the thought in my head was "I will show you great and mighty things, which you do not know." The whole verse says "Call on me and I will answer you and I will show you great and mighty things, which you do not know." God had given me a shell I hadn't seen there before to show me that even though I couldn't imagine being happy living here, He could do that new thing for me....He could do "more than all I ask or imagine." (That verse is from Ephesians...a verse our home church memorized together one year under Pastor Lennox Palin.) Did you notice the title of our blog site??? :)

So God blessed me, and what PEACE He brings! There is something to be said for times in your life when your moments of intimacy with God are the best part of the whole day BY FAR. That's not such a bad place to be....

That feeling of agony I had felt in the night has come to me in waves, and at those times feels insurmountable. I've thought "What a horrible Christian/missionary, who has so much, and still wants more....who would rather live comfortably at home with family and friends, than live here where God has called me." I used to think it was just feelings of homesickness and selfishness that brought on those dark times. But after several severe emotional times just prior to something amazing happening, I started to realize it was not just a feeling, but a spiritual attack. It reminded me of the nights before I would go to Taycheedah Correctional Institute for prison ministry on Tuesdays of last year. I LOVED to fellowship with and mentor those women in prison! BUT..the night BEFORE prison trips...I didn't want to go!

I had one more bad episode, the weekend we attended a seminar for Child Evangelism Fellowship. After our time there we met an amazing woman named Grace who has next to nothing, but trusts God to provide through gifts given to CEF that are passed along to her. She holds a Good News club for children in a squatter area. She explained to us that it isn't easy to go there, and it is hard to trust God for her finances sometimes, but she does. She is a single mom, and calls her 8 year old daughter, named Angel, her prayer partner. Meeting this woman was SUCH an encouragment to me! We went from this meeting down to Puerto Galera that weekend again and were able to attend for the first time a church service at Aninuan Christian Church, the church started from the ministry of Threads of Hope. God is SO good.

Sorry, this has gotten long...they won't ALL be this way, I think. haha :) I hope you all can experience God the way I have over the past year!

Blessings!

Chris